Restaurante Kiener Terrae
Cnetro Comerica Paitilla Mall
Ave 8a y Calle 56, Local #2

So I’ve already come to the conclusion that most expats here in Panama have no taste buds. Twice now I’ve gone to restaurants with rave reviews, twice now it’s been a waste of my money. Also I was told the chef was from Miami, he isn’t, he’s Colombian.

This restaurant is gorgeous, there is no doubt about that. They spent a lot of money doing the interior design. Once again the high end restaurants in Panama (not just Panama, but so far any high end one I’ve gone to) have gorgeous design, terrible or average food & average or terrible service.

Since Panamanians are known for being pretentious, this doesn’t surprise me that they care more about how the restaurant looks than what’s inside.

Anyway, back to my review…

I was excited because it has all organic produce & I assume also the meat, chicken, fish, etc.

They make a big deal about presentation & the chef lacks the skills to make the food actually taste good. PLUS they charge a fortune.

I ordered 5 different dishes & they were all wacky is the only word I can describe.

Here is what I ordered & my thoughts:

  1. Fried Wantons with beef – this was the best dish out of all of them as the sauce was supposed to be terriyaki & the beef was tasty. The problem was they skimped on the beef. They cut the wontons in half & sprinkled a little bit of beef inside.
  2. Chilean Empanada – It was burn around the edges & while the concept was interesting putting an egg inside, it was dry & tasteless.
  3. Lasagna de Berenjena – their version of eggplant parmigiana EXCEPT it was one layer & so small it was a total rip off at $10. Instead of all eggplant, it was eggplant & a tomato filler.  And again, tasteless.
  4. Ensalada Caprese – I’ve NEVER had a salad caprese like this & this salad is one of my favorites, so I tend to have it at a lot of restaurants back home. Again with the tricks. They scooped out a roma tomato & made that the base, plopped in pesto, put a piece of fresh basil underneath that & then a VERY SMALL fried piece of cheese underneath.

    Maybe had the cheese NOT been fried it would have been okay. Maybe had there actually been tomatoes I could taste that may have made the dish better. Once you scoop out the tomato, what’s to taste but skin?

    The whole thing was tasteless & it was less than lukewarm. We told the waitress, she didn’t care.

  5. Benedict Hamburger (small size) – they took beef on a bun, plopped a fried egg on top, gave me some weak benedict sauce in a small bowl & that was it. The entire thing had NO TASTE.

    Then they gave me so called home made fries that tasted frozen to me although they swore they were home made AND they covered the fries in some bread crumbs or something. Tasteless & weird.

So I wasted close to $45 on  nothing.

As for the service, the waitress was attentive in the beginning, but then at the end she never gave us our bill, we had to ask another waitress. Even the change I needed wasn’t given to me, I had to get someone to do it.

The only time she came up to us was at the tail end when one of the owners came over to ask us how everything was. Then she rushed up to ask me the same thing. I told him not good. I think he was shocked (remember, no one ever tells them the truth), but he failed to try to rectify the problem.


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